Dear Everyone,

    I am writing because this summer has taught me a lot.  I have come to realize I ruin peoples lives.  If I have done that to you I am so sorry and I am positive I did not mean to hurt you.  You are a great person and I am sure I learned a lot from each and everyone of you.  I look back on what I have accomplished in life and have come to see that all I do is in the words of Dan "Shit all over people"! Why do I hurt the ones I love? All I can say is I am afraid of getting hurt and it is easier to keep people at a distance or push them away. I always seem to mess up and hurt everyone that  matters to me.  I've hurt Dan, The Dunn Family, Danny, Megan, Courtney, Steve, Rob, my entire family, and I am positive there are many many more.  My actions are inexcusable and I should be locked up for hurting the people I care about.  This is very Tressa-ish (Jill I know you know what I mean and I hope you laughed at my word!) but I do need to look for God and his guidance because I screw up too much on my own.  I never intentionally do things to hurt others, it just always ends up that way and for that I am so so so so sorry.  If there is anything I can do to make things up to those I have hurt just let me know.  I do not ever think before I act, this is my biggest flaw and that is how so many people get hurt.  I say what I am feeling and usually assume things. Then I end up saying things I regret and I cannot take them back.  Words do hurt!!! I wish I had time to start over and make things up to everyone but I do not think anyone wants to give me another chance and I have to live with that. I have to live with the consequences of my actions.  If there is one thing I have to say it is this...

To the Dunn family and Dan:     I am so sorry and I wish I thought before I acted.  If there was a time machine I would use it here the most because you all were so nice to me and I screwed all of you over.  We all say things we don’t mean in anger and I know I never would of don’t a thing but I said what I said and I am really sorry.  I know you don’t think I am sincere but if you could see me, you would know I am.  I cry mostly because I hurt you Mr. Dunn, someone who has been nothing but the best to me.  Then for hurting the guys.  I love Dan and I cannot say why, but I do.  I would do anything for those guys and I screwed them over.  I wish I could change the past but you cannot so I can only hope for better in the future and look towards my future and hope I have learned from my mistakes.  I love you all so much and I do hope later down the road we can talk and work this all out.  I have never hated who I am and what I did so much in my life.  I think you are such great people and so wonderful.  I wish you all knew how much you mean to me.  Don’t let anyone tell you any different. 

To Courtney:     If only I trusted you more and let you go, things would have been different.  I never meant to hurt you. I wish I could tell you in person how sorry I am for hurting you, you are the best person in the world and any girl is lucky to have you.  Good luck in football and at Truman State.  

To Rob:     Sorry that a lot of stuff got out of hand after we broke up and I never meant to hurt you.  I will always have a place for you in my heart.  You are so amazing and don’t let anyone say anything different.  Keep your head up and look for the best in everyone. Do not dwell on the little things. 

To Megan:     You were my best friend and then I let a guy take me away from you.  He made me believe I could do no better. For hurting you I am sorry.  I reread every letter we used to pass back and forth and they made me cry.  We had some amazing times for sure. Good luck in all you do. 

To Danny:      I am sorry you feel like I lead you on.  I am sorry that in a sense I did.  I guess you are really more of a friend than anything else. I am sorry you hate me and I gave you any reason to not trust me.  Keep searching the right girl is out there for you. 

To Steve:     I am so sorry for everything, that is all there is to say.  I am sorry I made you think I did not like you.  I wish you only success and happiness; good luck in all you do. 

Love,

    Liz

PS If anyone has advice I am def. open for it.  But then I have to ask where were you when I needed it before I made this huge mistake???